Returning [open]

[Tyra]

((I couldn't help but bring her back... Plus, it'll boost activity a little, I'm hopeful at least))

Marimba
Take a step back...
When she had last been here she had been six months old. A young cub, full of life and enthusiasm with that playful cheekiness. But returning was a much different femmora. From that clumsy, yet talented, cub had emerged a beauty. At a year and a half old she would soon be reaching sexual maturity. Her dark golden coat had lost it's fluffiness and had become sleek and soft. Her brown eyes had lost their mischeavious spark, which was replaced by one of maturity and a wish to do what was right. Each move she made was fluent, pad following pad in a steady rhythm, practically silent. She did not mean to be so quiet, it came with being a huntress, which she was, naturally.
Ears flicked at every sound, her nasals taking in all the scents, and all the time she kept asking her the same things- were they still here? Would they take her back? She hated herself for having left in the first place but it had been the right thing to do, at the time. But now? Things were different- she was mre mature, and less troublesome. She would be an asset to the pride, not a hindrance.
With each move muscles flowed like water, visible on the surface as a rippling. The muscles were toned, there for the purposes of hunting, and fighting if it came to that. But she didn't enjoy such things, she'd been 'talked' out of it when she was young, and the ragged scars on her right flank were but a constant reminder of that. The very thought of that caused a rumble in her throat as muscles tensed for but a moment, and then she carried on. Swift and silent. Searching.
She was searching for any signs of anyone. A carcass, a scent, anything. But so far, she was struggling. Her brow furrowed and she stopped, thinking, head swinging as she glanced across the plains with dark brown eyes reflecting the light. Her tongue scraped over her muzzle and she sighed.
Noone. Where had they all gone? Had they branched off into the other prides? Were they still around somewhere, just not here? Again she glanced around and thought. What was the best way to get their attention if they were around? Why, to announce her presence of course.
So with that her jaws parted, revealing terribly sharp teeth, as a mighty roar ripped through the silent lands. When she had finished she listend, ears twitching, but heard nothing. But it was a chance someone was out their, someone would hear. Even a loner would do. As long as she knew what was going on.
She sauntered across the barren lands and collapsed beneath a tree, deciding that now it was time to wait, and it was best to wait in the shade, away from the glare of the sun. Soon they would reach the hottest part of the day. Perhaps that was why she had not found anyone. She hoped.
Lazily, she watched the lands. Hoping, praying, that someone would answer her call.
Am I still who I used to be?

[Lassiel]

She did not like the heat of mid-day sun--but then, there wasn't much that Rhian did like. The rain and mud of the season could also be added to that long and winding list. But even she would admit that, every now and then, it was comforting to see her pride again, especially her father. By now, it was not uncommon for the unsociable lioness to distance herself from the group, and Truth was most likely used to it. Or at least he should be. But the guilt that came with that knowledge...knowing that he wished for her to stay with the pride instead of on the sidelines did hurt the part of her that cared for the only father she'd ever had--blood relation be damned! But he wanted to help her, and Rhian knew with certainty that she was beyond help.

Guilt and pain aside, she was here now, intending to stay for a few days--a week, perhaps--before moving on. It was the least she could do. Eiroka. The only home she had always known. Dust covered her creamy yellow hide as she brushed through the thickets, though it did nothing to hide the ugly scar that adorned her face--the result of a failed attempt to catch a warthog. The deepest part was at her muzzle, but the length of the entire thing ran all the way to her ear, barely missing her right eye in the process. She supposed she should be thankful for that. She wasn't. It was a depressing thought (though that was nothing new) that, before Rhian was even three years old, she possessed such a hatred of the world.

Stopping at a small pool, Rhian allowed herself a drink of water, though she did not stay long. She only wanted to find Truth and be done with it, but it seemed no one was around. It confused her, but she did not dwell on it--mostly due to the sound her sensitive ears picked up. A roar--greeting, beckoning--but lacking the strength of her fathers. Still...it was better than nothing. Maybe this one would know where the pride had disappeared to--or at least its King. Slipping through more brush, she came upon another lioness resting beneath a tree. She looked...somewhat familiar, but Rhian could not simply not remember who she was. Not a surprise, considering she was absent from pride life all the time. Cautiously padding forward and revealing herself, Rhian silently studied her, inwardly grimacing at what she saw. Like every other woman out there, this one was young and beautiful in comparison to her emancipated look. Don't forget that lovely scar, dear. You know no one else does. Forcing the thoughts out of her mind, though they lingered like always, she managed to dip her head in a polite greeting. "Hello." Short and to the point. No one ever said she was a talkative lioness, even around the few she knew well.

[Tyra]

Marimba
Take a step back, what do you see?
For a while Marimba thought she was out of look. Not that that was abnormal to her. After all, the lioness had definitely not had an easy life. No, not by any means. She'd been turned away by her family at a very young age simply because she'd been too much trouble, she'd come here but decided that they'd be better off without her. So she had left and, a year later, she had now returned.
She was not without her changes, for she now found it more satisfying to help things along than to hinder them, and she understood what an annoyance she must have been. Her talents in hunting had improved dramatically too, as her patience had grown. She was patient enough to wait, to select the right prey now. She didn't rush into terrible failures these days.
Still, when first seeing her that would not be the most noticeable thing. That, of course, would be the mere size difference. She'd been a cub, now she was full-sized and near to sexual maturity. Her pelt was not fluffy, and her eyes not filled with youth but of maturity and care.
She had long since decided that this was her place. here, at least, she knew someone, right? That was if they were still here, or if anyone cared anymore. She sighed, her head resting on her pillar, and then it lifted once more. She was picking up of a scent. She rose to her pads and sniffed the air, smiling.
It may have been a long time since last they had met, but she had not forgotten that scent. Rhian was one of the two she had met from the pride. The femme was, from her memory, a little on the anti-social size, but perhaps she'd know where everyone had gone.
So she sat up and waiting, tassel flicking slightly until the form of another appeared, quickly approaching. To begin with, Marimba stayed watchful, but as the figure neared she merely smiled. There was no mistaking who that was. But it was not the scar that ensured her she was correct, it was the lack of words.
"Well I never, it's Rhian. she said in greeting, It's good to see you. she paused, glancing at the femme and then around. "I suppose you don't remember me. I mean, it has been a year..." another pause. "It's Marimba." she told her, hoping to spark some kind of memory. Yeah, like that would happen. She hadn't exactly been here very long before she left. She hadn't even been accepted into the pride.
It was awkward, of course, she had expected no more. There was always the chance they wouldn't take her back, the chance she'd be told to get lost. But... She had to try. It was all she wanted, a place in a pride, and this seemed like the best option.
Does anybody remember me?

[Lassiel]

Rhian blinked once. Twice. Marimba? The young cub that had joined the Alethea, only to disappear some time ago? A smile suddenly appeared on her face and for a moment, the ever present cloud that surrounded her lifted. "Marimba, yes. You disappeared awhile ago--at least, that's what I heard." Not that Rhia would have known on her own. She tended to be out of the loop when it came to pride news. Indeed, she often learned of things long after they had passed. She wondered what had caused Marimba did disappear. She doubted it was similar to Rhian's own problems. The younger lioness seemed to be quite at ease with others.

Sitting down, a creamy ear flicked as she thought of what else to say now that the initial greeting had been made. Already far from the most talkative of creatures, Rhian also lacked basic...well...chit-chatting abilities. She simply didn't know what to say. Struggling to fill the silence, she voiced her earlier question. "Why?" Noticing only after she had stopped speaking that Marimba may not know what she was asking, Rhian quickly explained. "Did you leave, I mean." She truly was somewhat curious, as she couldn't imagine actually leaving her pride and family.

ooc: Sorry it's short!

[Tyra]

Marimba
A memory returned...
The femme was unlike Rhian in many ways. Indeed, she had never had problems conversing with others. No, her main problem arised in settling down without disrupting things. Or it had at least. She'd changed a lot since those troubled days of youth. For certainly she had been a troubled cub, though it had never shown on the outside. Her troubles had been deep set, founded from an unstable home and being turfed out, unwanted by those she had thought loved her.
But it was with shock that she noticed it- a smile had settled upon the other's face. This in itself made Marimba feel good, for it seemed that this ess smiles rarely, from what she had seen as a cub at least.
"Yes..." she glanced across the lands then back at Rhian- it was only instinct. She was a huntress, she was always on the lookout for a decent chance at a meal. Afterall, being alone made it somewhat difficult at times. "A long time ago, but I never forgot this place, and those I met within it's lands." Again her eyes grazed the lands, searching.
A silence fell between the two for a minute, a silence in which Marimba thought back to her time here. They were fond memories. Memories where she had been happy, even if had been for such a short time.
Rhian spoke up but the question confused the ess to begin with, her brow furrowing, until Rhian made it clear what it was she meant. "Well, Rhian, I had a problem." she started, wandering how to word what she was about to say. "Everywhere I went I caused problems, and this pride was so nice, I just didn't want to bring my problems onto you. You didn't deserve it." she told her.
Marimba's weight shifted slightly and her ears flicked. She was still on high alert, curious as to whether anyone else would wander upon her, and how they would react to her. Afterall, the reaction from Rhian had been much better than she had expected.
... But can she learn?

[Lassiel]

’Everywhere I went I caused problems….I just didn’t want to bring my problems onto you.’ That sounded…painfully familiar. Wasn’t Rhian the same way? Her swift and sudden mood swings made others uncomfortable—even her own pride. It was just…easier…to distance herself from those problems. A little lonely, maybe, but she was used to it by now. And then others didn’t have to see Rhian at her worst. Really, she wondered if anyone knew just how dark many of her days were. How it sometimes took a great force of will to move from the spot she had laid down at the night before. Often she didn’t have that strength, and so stayed there another day, and another. Her gaunt frame didn’t come an inability to hunt, but from a lack of any desire to do so. Caught within her own destructive cycle of thoughts, her days bled slowly into the next until it was impossible to differentiate between them. Maybe that was why she hadn’t recognized Marimba at first. It hadn’t felt like that much time had passed her by.

Noticing the way Marimba seemed to be on the look out for others, Rhian’s hope of her knowing where Truth was diminished. She shook her head slightly. “If you are looking for others of the pride, I haven’t seen anyone in the area. Not even my father.” Could she blame them if the pride disappeared without telling her? It was her fault, not theirs, that she chose to distance herself from them. “He’ll be back though. He doesn’t abandon others, even when he should.” A thin thread of bitterness wove through her words, though she hated it. He should have left her and her brother to their own devices long ago. They weren’t worth his time, not when they weren’t truly his. Her wandering gaze landed on Marimba again, the lightly colored, nearly orange eyes shadowed. “You’d be amazed what I deserve.” A small shrug of the shoulders. “Or maybe not. Seems everyone knows our story, now.”

[Tyra]

Marimba
Take it from me
Marimba had never had a problem surviving alone. What had she been, five months when she'd been thrown out? Boy, that was a long time ago now. Yet she still hadn't settled down anywhere, hadn't had it in her to attempt it for more than a few weeks. She had been scared of causing trouble, afraid that no matter what she did she'd always be in the wrong. That had led to her drifting, a loner, from pride to pride. That had led to her reaching this age and not truly meaning what family was, not knowing what it was to be in a pride. But, hey, she'd lived had she not? Was she not stood there, a beauty, nearly mature? Yes, she had a lot to learn, but at least she had a fighting spirit, and therefore the will to go on and learn.
With each day that passed her now, Marimba knew it was time to take that step; to banish to fears of destruction and step into the life she should always have had. No, her parents had not been good ones. They had made the wrong choices and there she was, only half the lioness she would have been.
If she had stayed with her family, would the fight ever have happened? If she had not left them, would she have been left with the scars? So much would have been different, she'd have been a princess. Yet it was not to be, for those things had happened, and she had to go on, no matter how little she wish to.
But how it had hurt the little cub, to be chased away. How hunger had taught her to hunt instead of family. How instinct had been her guide. Such a life, such a lot of pain and hurt. Still, she had come out ok.
Some would have called it amazing that she had, of course. She still trusted others, did not hate the world for being happy when she was not. She went about life normally, no intent to harm or kill, nor to avoid others. After all, Marimba was in her element when with others.
But as she watched the other's face, she could not help but wander what had happened to make Rhian the way she was. Why did Rhian choose to sit on the sidelines, away from others. Was there a hint of recognition in her eyes, was it possible that Rhian had a similar reason to herself? Yet she could not bring herself to ask, for if it was so she knew how terrible it could be, and it would only bring her to a stage where she'd want to help even though she knew no way.
"Yes, I am sure he will return Rhian. I saw how he cared for you, the little time I was here. Yes, such care was there. I wish only that I had ever had someone who cared for me, someone I could have turned to. You were lucky, Rhian." she told the ess, pausing. "So now we wait, and out patience will eventually be paid off."
But the next words spoken were such that took her by surprise, for Rhian spoke of what she deserved. It was so strange, for though Marimba had noticed a certain depression around the older femme she had never known that she despised herself so. It was concerning, to say the least.
"Dear Rhian, I am sure you deserve nothing short of friendship, family and happiness. Why should you? Why would you say you deserved the misery I would surely have attracted should I have stayed?"
This isn't who I was meant to be

[Lassiel]

Lucky, am I? Maybe a few lucky things have happened to me, but I did not deserve them and I am far from a lucky being. As always, her thoughts were critical, judging herself more harshly than she even judged the world. Perhaps he cares for me, but only because he feels obligated, I'm sure. The bitter words were painful, but felt so true. She shook her head as Marimba continued, feeling the inherent wrongness in everything the lioness said. She didn't know. She didn't know. And it was not something that could be explained so easily. All that mattered was that Rhian knew her own worthlessness--she didn't need anyone to tell her...or try to convince her otherwise.

A hollow laugh and a dim, spiritless voice. "And what would you know? I'm certain any misery you could have brought to us would pale in comparison to the desolation my very existence causes." Unfair, perhaps, to speak to the younger lioness in such a way. She was only trying to help. But...she didn't understand. And Rhian hated it when others tried to 'help' her. It was simply another proof of her futile life, the pathetic existence she still tried so desperately to live. Why did she try so hard and not just give up? Was it her love for Truth and the guilt she would feel over causing him pain? Or was she simply just afriad of what awaited her? It could easily be both. Rhian knew her mother had loved her, but always--always--there had been the question of 'what if?' What if she had truly been Truth's daughter, and not the child of some stranger? Rhian wasn't dense. She knew there was something wrong with her--with the way she thought and the emotions she felt. But then...there was something wrong with all of Truth's adopted children--or at least, the two that remained. Although she hadn't seen her brother in a long time, she doubted Oedipus was all that sane, though he may put a good show on.

The thin lioness's ears had slowly pinned back as her thoughts continued, the end of her tail twitching. She was not angry, though it could come across that way, but distraught. It seemed that no matter what she told herself, the end result was always the same. Every now and then a day would come where the world didn't seem as the dark--the day seemed a little brighter, the sun slightly warmer--but then the clouds would drift over again, and everything lost its color. She would give anything to be like Marimba--beautiful, confident, kind--but she knew it wasn't meant to be. Her place, like always, was on the sidelines, watching the lives of others pass her by.

[Tyra]

Marimba
Why do you look at me that way?
Marimba saw the bitterness is the lioness's eyes, and once again found herself wandering why she thought so lowly of herself. Surely there was no reason to hate oneself as she so obviously did? Poor Marimba was left feeling ever-more sorry for Rhian. She was such a friendly lion deep down- sure, a little anti-social- but nothing hugely terrible. But then, Marimba always seemed to find the good in others. Maybe other lions saw her differently. But, truth be told, Marimba could not see how. In no way could she understand it.
"And what would you know? I'm certain any misery you could have brought to us would pale in comparison to the desolation my very existence causes." Upon hearing these words Marimba visibly frowned. No, she could not have such a nice lioness being so cruel to herself. She could not watch Rhian lead such a life. But then, she could not force her to do anything either. Perhaps there was something she could do- anything. While thinking, she decided to speak.
"While it is true I know nothing of your past, Rhian, I find it hard to believe you cause such pain to anyone. From what I have seen you are, in fact, a very pleasant lioness, and I feel no doubt that Truth loves you, not as a friend but a daughter.
She paused, letting a bitter-sweet silence fall.
"Why don't we try to find others together? I have a feeling the company may do you good."

Do you have something to say?

[Lassiel]

Maybe he does love me as a true daughter, but he shouldn't. Not at all. Rhian turned away at the frown that crossed Marimba's face, not liking the look she saw on the younger lioness. Pity and sadness didn't sit well with her, not when it was directed toward her. Already ashamed of her earlier sharp words to Marimba, Rhian held her peace this time, instead condemning herself in her mind. She was not the pleasant sort to be around, and she knew it. Her moods made her picky and hard to predict--not the best person to have around, especially with the inner politics of a pride. Yet another reason Truth shouldn't accept her--she was dangerous to his position, though she doubted--with the certainty of a child--that the Alethea king could ever be forced from his position.

The silence that followed Marimba's words seemed stifling to Rhian, and for once, she was relieved when the quiet was broken. 'I have a feeling that company may do you good.' ...Yes. She agreed with the lioness on that point. There were only two reasons she always returned to the pride. Although she could not understand his love for her, Rhian would never leave Truth wondering about her fate. And the lioness did not think she could force herself to stay away that long. She needed others to keep her sanity. To keep from falling too deep into herself. "That...sounds nice." Voice hesitant and soft, she offered a small smile. "I'm afraid I don't know where to start though. I haven't been here in....well, awhile."

[Tyra]

Marimba
Lets take a journey of discovery
Though, in many ways, Marimba pitied the elder, she also held respect for her. Despite the difficulties she had obviously faced Rhian still managed to carry on. In the mind of the youngster, that in itself was an achievment. Yet it was Marimba's way to find the best in everyone, she could not accept that anyone was completely bad. She didn't have it in her heart to condemn someone to the status of unsavable. Everyone had a saving grace. Yes, even Rhian, though she refused to see it.
Marimba hoped that one day Rhian would be confident enough, around her at least, to be herself. She wanted to know the lioness, to be her friend. Friends were there for each other through thick and thin. Marimba wanted to be their for Rhian and hoped that perhaps, should she ever be in need, Rhian would be there for her to. Perhaps she would be thankful for the friendship Marimba offered. Then again, she could always turn her away.
"No, nor do I. Perhaps we should wander away from home turf. Truth could be anywhere, and we may find others with him. Afterall, I think a reunion is in order..." Marimba paused, frowning, and then set off, hoping that Rhian would follow.
And see what we can find

Out of character garbage: I'm going to jump into Cake and Vox's thread.

[Lassiel]

It was startling to be so accepted, or at least tolerated, by another. Of course, Rhian spent so much time away from others that few were ever even given the chance to hold a conversation with her. Really, Truth and Oedipus were the only two she could think of, though she wondered if her brother even counted any more. It had been...a long time since the siblings had last spoken with one another. She listened silently to Marimba's words and watched her walk off. The lioness didn't quite know if she wanted to meet others so quickly, but if Marimba was any example, perhaps it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe the younger lioness was just putting on a show for Rhian, acting kind when her real thoughts were far from that. But...Rhian hoped that was not the case, and so took her words and actions at face value.

When Marimba was a few yards away, Rhian finally moved to follow her, murmuring softly, "Yes...perhaps it is." She didn't know where exactly they were going, but that was nothing new. Rhian seldom knew what her destination was--just that she was going somewhere away from others. Except this time...there was someone with her. A companion. It was different, but not unwelcome. Even if they did not speak a single word to each other as they searched for Truth, it would still be a nice change.

ooc: So are we done with this thread? I don't think I'll have Rhian join Cake's thread. Let's just say they've been traveling together and have split up for the short moment when Marimba finds Truth?