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Around and around the winds churn, chaos unmatched as they rip and they tear. And yet at the eye, the center, the heart, is an area of utmost peace… in the middle of such disastrous devastation. The current is strong at the surface, the current is easier underneath. Where one can not breathe, where one cannot breathe, of course it’s easier there. Of course. So much irony in the world. So much to mock and laugh at. Funny how difficultly simple things are. One man once said all the world was a stage, and all the men and women players. Oh, honey, that isn’t something hard to believe. The world the stage, the people puppets… with someone behind the curtains pulling the strings. Dance, dance, dance. See me bobbing and ducking. Issuing commands underneath the surface… It isn’t hard for me to feel as if I’m controlled. But perhaps I am simply thinking too much. Seeing deeper then what’s required. It’d be easy to live with it, live with that ‘sneaking suspicion’ if I could simply care to say ‘Oh, let me be controlled, I don’t care anymore’, it would be simple if I could say that. But, alas, I can’t. I can’t and mean it. I wasn’t born to please. Nor was I born a lady who concedes. Play the hand life dealt you, and play it well. Don’t tip it before your ready but don’t give in before the fight’s even begun.

It was happening. Again, again, again. It tended to happen. Yep, yep, yep. Now was the time, no time like the present after all, and she was curious again. Not truly curious but interested, intrigued. As she was now and again if one cared to believe someone such as her could even be amused by the possibility, the idea. After all she wasn’t a very… understandable being. Wouldn’t be hard to simply presume she was nasty and cruel and she had no affection or love or compassion for children either. Wouldn’t be too hard to presume and those who did so, despite the fact assuming tends to make, well, and ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me’, they wouldn’t be too far off the mark. She wasn’t benevolent. Or so it seemed. Note we say seem, since we have yet to reveal a time when she was benevolent, truly, nor have we had any… situation where ‘benevolence’ was really called for. Talking to others, fully grown and such and with good mind and common sense, no need to be nice. No need. Why be nice when one could be bad? Why? She didn’t need friends or companions. She just needed ‘me, myself and I’… Or did she? She was told a long time ago it was unhealthy to be alone all the time. That she should try to have a friend, if only one. He said it’d feel quite frankly, pretty nice and hell she might even like it. He said though she never said it, it was obvious she was just lonely. That she just wanted a friend and some companionship. Someone to be around, that didn’t pry but was there to listen… for no matter what she contended he said he knew that she wanted her story told. Wanted someone, someone to know. She didn’t want to be forgotten. No one did. He said she didn’t ‘just need me, myself and I’ and for all others to just… back the hell of. And she was willing to think perhaps he was right, if only for this rare moment. See, if she did she wouldn’t have gotten to thinking. And if she was in proper mood and state of mind, her thinking wouldn’t end in this way. And yet…

And yet just because the bird’s wings are clipped… Just cause… will that bird stop attempting to fly? Aye, it might kill the birdie in the end but that bird aches for the sky so… It cannot, not try. Though she had a decent way with convincing herself of things every few years, oh my, it got the best of her. These ‘maybes’ and ‘ifs’ and ‘possibilities’… they got to thickening the stew. Besides it was a woman’s nature, aye, to become a mother? To have children, to raise children, to tend to children? Nature? A very common desire? And oh my did she have that desire. It was a thick one, one that was thick in her blood, her veins, her being. But it was such a thick substance… so thick, it was painful. See, this wasn’t anything new. She tended to have these thoughts as often as thoughts of him, her history, the past, and death. Very common thoughts and somewhat disturbing that children were mixed up in her depressing little show but, alas, Babylon! What could she say? She had her own faults and her own faults, they ran deeper then what was obvious. And though these thoughts weren’t new, after a few heartbreaking failures they tended to be suppressed… and as the years wandered on it became more of a… jab in the dark, a ‘what the hell’ attempt. Something she doubted… But despite that… She got hopeful, excited, happy. Expectations rising… so happy, maybe they would live, mhmm? Maybe? Quite possibly! And then… a side of her commented of this ‘Don’t get your hopes up’ and despite that comment she always seemed to do so, usually [on some days she was in more intense glum so she really lost that ‘care’] and… then always have those hopes, dreams, crashing down and being crushed. Quite a horrible feeling… and during those days afterwards she use to be quite a vulnerable thing, and yes, that is a thing of ‘oh my’! Asaki the Cold, Asaki Rhetoric… vulnerable? Perhaps… so.

It was beautiful, you know. The rain was falling and how it fell was brilliant. Dropping like tears the day was the day that one expects to be buried on. With thunder rumbling in the distance and lightening staying in the clouds. With the clouds rolling and the wind dead. With the rain falling and the world carrying itself along on its knees the gloom was overwhelming. Overwhelming to those who adored and loved the sun so but to those whose heart ached and yearned for those rainy days, majestic and serene. The day was hauntingly beautiful… it was fantastic, a chill coming in if only somewhat so. Everything so… so… The world was at peace as it grieved. As it washed the sins away and bathed the evil in pure rain. The silence was heavenly, unearthly, an so longed for. It was complete, this day, it only added to her… did so much for her. It added to good temper and renewed spirit. Added bounce and flamboyance. It added personality, personality and by this we mean true personality not restricted emotions and regulated doses of enthusiasm or glee. She was different and one could feel it. She was almost normal, you know, almost. She could be mistaken for someone happy, content someone living life and enjoying it so. She could be mistaken for such… she could but chances are she wouldn’t be. Most likely she would be mistaken for a rather darker thing. A horror, a courtesan, mhmm… man-eater she really wasn’t but… It was obvious she was looking for something and obvious she was in the frame of mind of… pretty much good indifference. Shopping for a healthy one, she was… As well as one who wasn’t terribly stupid and one who… could keep up. Looking for a good specimen, she wanted the better of chances, you see. But she also wanted… mhmm… how do we put this? She was content to raise them on her own. And to be honest, that was how she wanted it. She was here because she needed something and she knew what she wanted. She wanted the service not the subscription. For heaven knew she wouldn‘t be able to put up with the bastard who she mated with for long. She wasn't 'wife' material. And besides that added to the appeal, right? This 'get in, get out' job? She wasn't asking for the unloyal little brat to stick around. Didn't that add to the appeal? Last she check she wasn't horrible on the eye either, and with a little effort surely…

It had occurred that perhaps she should gain ‘permission’ from her Queen. That she should do things ‘properly’ and go through the pride. Yet, about that time it also occurred to her that they still did not have a King and most of the pride was a horde of women. A bitch fest. She doubted she would get any blessing or acceptance for asking. They would say no, this she had much faith in and alongside that and her blatant lack of care and concern for the Akina? It was obvious her decision as she lounged so casually. Relaxed with a tail strumming out a tempo. Darling eyes, light but fierce watching the area as ears turned. Listening intently to the music of the rain but also the splashing of footsteps along the muddy, wet bank. She was waiting for… she doubted it would take long before her invitation was accepted. If it was not? Then she would try someone else… desperation she did not have… she knew full well there weren’t many nice men out there, many gentlemen, kindred and kind and calm and she knew that this was the breeding season and everyone was trying to get in on it. She knew that if there was still news of raped flirting on the wind and in the mouths of those who gossip there would be someone out there who’d be ever eager, especially so when the female actually permitted it. Logic said so and she liked her logic because of it. She knew before the breeding season was over she would have mated. She knew that perhaps she wouldn’t get pregnant and perhaps if she did, she might very well lose the children during the days and months that fallowed. But the prospect was enough to merit a plan. A plan of action if she became pregnant. Would she go back to the pride? She didn’t ask them for approval and she knew full well they would be ticked because of it. Risk their wrath…? Though she doubted they had the heart or the stomach to beat a miscarriage into another gal… some reason she didn’t think Lothril had the heart, the mind, nor the strength to do it. The ‘going back’ was an option only because being a rogue during such a time was… hard and difficult. And there wouldn’t be any daddy around to help. Hunting would become harder and hyenas would be a surefire problem… the stress wasn’t good for the children within but… They already had he odds against them anyway, didn’t they?

Are you going to get your hopes up again? No… it’s just, maybe they’ll… Maybe they’ll what? … Your pathetic. Just because the ones before… Do remember anything? Do you know anything? Are you thick? Is it not getting through? Think it’s just ‘bad luck’ that makes so many litters die? Maybe it was just… Making excuses. How sad. Can’t handle honesty, can you? The truth of the matter? But there is a chance… There is a chance that you’ll lose them within the first month. There is a chance that you won’t be able to feed them. There is a chance they’ll be born dead. There is a chance you’ll be leaving little corpses again. Remember when you use to burry them? Remember when you use to name them? You don’t do that any more. You leave them dead, you leave them nameless. There is a chance that you’ll simply prove the obvious again, and again, and again. Why do you try? Better to be a fool then to open one’s mouth and prove it. He was right, you know he was. But… Pathetic. Ever pathetic. The smaller side of her faltered and failed and slipped back into the abyss of her core, it was defeated but there were other sections, other divided beings within her that outnumbered this more oppressive one. The good feelings were coming and before long it was buried. No more dark thoughts. Not now. If only for now and only for this small, small time. She had something to look forward to. And so to pass the time she pondered who would be her comely man tonight, today, sometime this wet season. Would he be dark and handsome? Tall and strong? Abrasive, kind, mild, simple. Would he be interesting or lacking and she would have to simply suffice. Would there be more then one, a couple? How would he react to her proposition…? She heaved a breath as she laid her head on the mud, the long grass all about this swampy area she waited. Her eyes watching the swaying grass, her music the rain and the thunder. Body ever relaxed and calm she was dirty yet clean. One side cleaned by the rain, the other dirtied for lounging in the dirt before long the female was taking a feline nap. Short and brief, where she was dancing on the edge of awareness and dreams. When was the boy going to come along? She wasn’t keen on waiting, but she supposed she could make an exception.
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There's something happening somewhere — baby I just know that there is.
You can't start a fire — you can't start a fire without a spark.
This gun's for hire — even if we're just dancing in the dark.

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[Vox]

The boy came quickly. Like all wild beasts, he did not come when called. He was simply there. But on special occasions--on very special occasions, mind you--he was obliging. Most of the time, he was the 'look but don't touch' sorta guy. She had once called him 'manly man', had she not? Was it a pride issue he had, not really being there when you needed him? Did he consider himself 'cool', simply because he was 'unreachable' for most of his life? No...He didn't think that was quite it. For what is the difference between a man and a boy besides the fact that he traded in his toy cars for a pack of Ferrari's? Or that he is too tall for his trousers, too broad for his little sailor suit? I, being of the opposite sex, cannot tell you. But I'm sure with a little use of Logic and Reason, our bosom friends, we may find the answer. They can tell you the answer to all the questions in the world! Except the ones that really matter. When you are confronted with evil, the two you kept in your head your whole life look through books. What does their manual say? Do something...Logical! Act...Reasonably! But what if...? The 'what if' is cast aside by the reasonable, it is not a great enough threat. The logical pursue it more carefully, but if they cannot find an answer they discard it as 'rubbish for senile old men'. The writer is not a senile old man. The writer is a young 'child' {in the opinion of most} with fresh ideas, and too many questions. Or so 'they' say. Who am I? They would tell you what your parents told you: you are a human being. But are you really? Or are you an alien? "But that's impossible!" screams dearest Reason. Why, though? "Well...Because nobody else is...I suppose." mutters Logic from his far corner. And yet...There was only one Einstein. There was only one E=MC2, right? "That was different..." It is the same. "No, it's not." ejaculates Reason. You're not being very logical, explain yourself. "Well...It...Just isn't!" says Logic weakly. Do you see what I mean now? Do you see now that you two do not have the ultimate answers? Why am I here? "To live." the two reply in unison. Yes, but why? Why live at all? "Because you were created, I suppose..." grunts Reason stoutly. Why were we created? Why did G-d not say 'good' after he made us, humans? If we are the highest of all races, then why are we imperfect?

Why do we rule the world, not animals, if we alone of all the Creator's creations are unfinished? The silence is ringing. MEETING ADJOURNED! bellows the official, with a sharp slap of his mallet. Truth sat alone in the rain, letting it soak his tawny pelt. It seeped slowly deeper and deeper into his pelt, but he let it. The rain had a good effect on him. Calming, yet stimulating, it soothed the nerves he developed as a king. Like a cigarette. The floodplains were a little too wet for his liking, but he came there to let go of his worries sometimes. That was not what he was here today for, though. His entire being was thrown into sharp relief. As if a lightning bolt had recently passed through the clouds to strike something. The storm gray clouds, so like his own eyes, were reflected there. Ever line of his musculature, ever strand of his coat, and every disdainful line created by his wrinkled nose was sharp and hard. For all his six years, he did not look old. Nor was he young. He was...Ageless. No gray hairs, no youthful spring. Simply as if he was caught somewhere in time, swimming in the heart of limbo. Face slightly marred, slightly scrunched with the effort of keeping the rain out of his eyes, he decided it was time to make himself known. Flicking the moister out of his eyes and mane, he padded silently forward. He had been watching her for some time now. The curious smell had filled the air, but he was not driven to distraction by it. Only weak men allowed themselves to be manipulated, and he was not weak. The king had to be careful, many lioness' grew snappy during their heat. And he would hate to rouse such an enmity from this particular one. Considering...How much he appreciated her. It was not exactly 'like'. It was not 'attraction', though now that he wasn't debating with her he noticed her beauty. It was more of a...Alright, it was a 'like'. There, go take that to your little friend and make her sing the song. 'Truth likes Asaki! Nah nah nabooboo!' or at least that was the way it's done in Boston. In England it's more of a hand-clapping tempo, and since the chicks are in uniforms and more likely than not they're ruddy cheeked and blue eyed...It's even more humiliating.

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She fiddled away the minutes, fiddled away the time. How odd it was, how she fiddled it away now. Breathing slow and cleanly, enjoying the scent of water in the air and for once… enjoying being wet and being in a pool of mud and water and dirt. Good cheer she had, good cheer as her eyes remained closed for a spell of time. Watching the colors behind her lids as she remained ever lounging. She had forfeiting thinking of depressing thoughts, she had forfeiting thinking of plans also. She was thinking of nothing, nothing at all and it was pure bliss. Not thinking of what one would do tomorrow, not thinking of being safe and having to worry about things. Do you know how wonderful it is? To have nothing on ones mind, to feel completely relaxed and soothed? The lines on her faces, the intense expression and ferocious expressions. The coldness, the hollowness, the lack of being, of soul was eased. She was alone and she was in the presence of none. She was not in the presence of thoughts, of those things that told her, reminded her of everything she was and should be and how she should act because of it. She was alone, an though to some it may be… ever sad and ever lonely and ever breaking it… it… really wasn’t. It was not like walking a dark path, like being tense while knowing something horrible will happen. It was not like being alone in a room with nothing at all and beginning to worry about being forgotten. It was not like she was the only person in the world. It was not that kind of alone. It was the alone that came with peace of mind and bliss. Of tranquility that touched the core. Such feeling was one she felt now and again on rare occasions [occasions such as these never did guarantee her greatest of tempers…] but…

But it was broken. A twitch on her feminine frame the only visual notice of alarm. But one could sense something else, how the air about changed. Chilling once again though it carried a more… cheerful and exuberant edge. Vivid she was feeling and eager. The idea of little ones, the idea of them playing. She saw it in her minds eye, them playing in the golden grass. Hiding in flowers and patches and having the greatest of fun. She saw them happy and she saw them around. She saw children, little ones who would stick around… ones that relied on her ones she could teach. She saw babes she could protect and would protect. She also… saw herself nearly starving herself, recalling her third litter that was birthed. All born small, all born dead and she stayed with them for days upon days upon days. Treating the corpses like little children, trying to convince others they were real and they were alive and they were just sleeping. She chased away the daring vultures, batted away the flies. Growing thin and thinner she remembered the looks of disgust and pity she was given. She also… remembered when the father simply had enough and took the still bodies away. How she chased after him and begged and pleaded and cried. Don’t… take my babies away. These thoughts were a picture, one that lasted for but few seconds. Thoughts, picture, movie that was provided by the oppressive side. The oppressive side that was now feeling the wrath and the strength of a happier one as the thought, the movie, the picture was thrown into a chest and locked and keyed and chained and thrown into the abyss that had once stored this pleased and amused creature. The one who now cocked her head, taking it from the ground to listen and see. Someone was here… someone was around and the prospect was enough to get butterflies fluttering.

She was now certain someone was about, and she now rose because of it. A small smile touching the corner of her black lips as her eyes wandered about. And yet… Mhmm, you. The thought was subtle and mild. Her head tipping at his arrival as she sat ever simply. Body loosened, relaxed. Seemingly forgetting what role she was suppose to play as he entered the scene. Yet, despite curiosity was touched. Now why oh why was the honorable soul here? If you’ve come to preach, honey, you can do it later. Your scarring off my appointments. Still, a more darker side was peeking, crawling from under the door. The part that thought Truthy wasn’t as much a paladin as he had most people thinking. That part said he was here on a matter of business. Now, normally that part would be hushed. But… mhmm? Deviousness. The lady was smiling now and such a smile was a teasing one. Watching him observantly she was but she lacked… intensity and ferocity at the moment. She was simply curious and simply interested. And simply a big ball of sunshine at the moment and he was the victim of it. Still sitting she was but she was tempted to rise. If only to get a closer look, if only to see how the big boy would react. “Hello...” The only word she could compose, she could think of nothing better… she wasn’t feeling up to an argument. She was suppose to play damsel in distress, you see. Helpless and cute and just dieing for a big, brawny thing. And with remembrance for her conversation with Rayen, one knew such wasn’t true. She was a good actor, a fine one… but, she could never do innocence and cute and fuzzy. To those who knew her, who had talked to her and stayed in her presence… they knew with undying ease she could never fall into ‘innocent’, ‘cute’ or ‘fuzzy’. It simply wasn’t in her nature. But… perhaps subtle, scheming and enticing would do? She hoped. “A little far from home, yah?”

[Vox]

So she was not in the mood to fight? Truth wasn't quite sure what to make of that. He had never been in her company without his sword drawn. Now that she was relaxed...It was a little unsettling. But he took it all in his stride, as he had been taught. Everything he did seemed to have been taught to him. Which brought up the question: are you what other raise you to be, or are you born with a personality? Maybe a little of both...As said before, the lady had always been a little suspicious and aloof. But then, so had he. Apparently her abuse had been very great indeed. Which he had known but not really thought over. Never having been a father before, and yet more fatherly to everybody in general than many other lions of his stature, Truth could not relate to the anguish of losing ones cubs like Asaki could. But he could still feel the pain of seeing a friend die, seeing a friend's eyes do dark as you stood over them, wondering what you had done...He warded off these dark thoughts. If he continued down that path, it would show on his face, and she would jump to conclusions. Their distance had been too great for speaking, and so Truth advanced. Usually there was a mood that followed his movements, casual or aggressive, maybe subtle or even twitchy. Now, he simply moved for the sake of moving. There was not hidden language behind it, other than the messages his rippling muscles sent and the musky cologne of mingled cardamom, frankincense and myrrh.

The water that came from the sky seemed to be exhausting it's supply, but it still came down. As if it sensed that the lands had had enough, the storm cloud was retreating sulkily. Nostrils flaring at the delightful smell of rain that filled the air, Truth peered up at the sky in a small bubble of bliss. He didn't mind that his eyes were being pricked by the cold liquid, it was cleansing. The only thing he didn't like about rain was the time in between dry and wet, damp if you will, when you feel sticky and unloved. But if you wait it out, as most people don't, then you will see how nice it is to be all wet. Lions don't like water, as a rule, but both of these seemed perfectly relaxed around it. The storm clouds were leaving now, but the rain only lessened by a notch. He was glad, it would be a shame if he had driven the Sir away from this place simply by his presence. The king felt he did that exceedingly often, ground peoples nerves until they snapped and the stalked off. Like Asaki did during their last meeting, well not exactly because she couldn't tolerate him. Simply because she felt it was time to leave. Narati, he had pushed her away by simply wanting to accept the way she was. But women, like flow'rs, do not grow the way you want them to. They can be broken, and if pressured will twist in unnatural spiral {bamboo is a plant, but we shall consider it in the same family as 'flow'rs}, but if a stick is pushed in their path of fruition...They bend away. The Queen had grow apart from him, and he had let her. Caught up in his own 'king drama', he had done nothing to narrow the gap. Truth flicked his tail to rid it of the rain, and droplets flew off of the brown tuft. His ears angled toward Asaki and his 'bliss bubble' popped as she spoke. ' Hello... ' She spoke, her usually harsh tones were extended and somehow...Softer. It was of course, twilight, and she most have been feeling less snappy than usual. Her last words came quickly after the first set, jogging to keep up. ' A little far from home, yah? ' A small, twisted smile was on his curved black lips now, and he flexed a tired muscle slowly before her replied in a soft, slightly amused voice. Quiet, and yet piercing. It nearly hurt, but in a way that you couldn't explain; only experience. "Yes, I suppose I am. But so are you, although I refer more to your preferred habitation, desert-child, than the Akina." " G-d knows you don't spend any time there... " He thought with an inward laugh.

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She offered a smile, charming she could do as well as give, more or less, authentic amusement. “Who I am, who I want to be. Drastic differences…” She said her words, spoke her peace. Perhaps they would make no sense to the average creature but as we have come to know Truth isn’t exactly average, nor is the darling Sileree. Her words meant what her words meant. Who she was, who she wanted to be. Drastic difference, so obvious-ly. The desert who she was, the swamp who she should be. Drastic differences, so obvious-ly. As most do they prefer the common, what one was use to. They preferred it because it was warm and friendly and comforting. She believe it or not even she enjoyed that sensation now and again of comfort and warmth. But who she was wasn’t someone that many wanted to be and what many thought was good, correct or worthy. She should not be who she was. She should be what she was suppose to be. And so one saw the swamp, the direct contract to the desert. She should be more womanly, more soft, less edged and so… much more comely and kind. She should be what she was not. It’d make everyone happy if she was… what she was not, don’t you think? She thought it would and once upon a time she, for the sake of it, decided to give it a try. This ‘being what she should be’. Needless to say she grew tired of that, and the swamps. Tired of faking to the point… it really wasn’t worth it. Maybe because we have switched words during this spell? ‘Who she was, who she wanted to be’ to… ‘Who she was, who she should be’. No wonder she grew tired of it, no wonder she was faking. It was what others wanted for her, not what she wanted for herself. Yet… ‘what she wanted for herself’…? What… an interesting question. One she didn’t know if she had the power, will, heart, or even the desire to answer. Unless of course one was willing to settle for a ‘less-deep’ answer?

Nah, she was interested in fighting. Not today but he could come back another time and she’d be more then willing to take out the gauntlets and get the party started. But… not today, not tonight. Tonight was a special night, you see, and important one for a honey such as herself. Could he tell? Dolling herself up for nothing wasn’t the beat she danced to. The small black dress, ruby red lips, boots that hit just below the knee and her hair done up just so. Nah, she wasn’t acting this way just for nothing… and because of it that question was popping back. Was he going to leave any time soon? She had appointments to keep. And yet as the thought came to mind another did also. A thought she liked and entertained because, frankly, she thought it was a clever one. It would scare him off tonight and every other night and perhaps get him leaving her alone for a good while. Give him something to think over and something to debate about while he was off on his own, far from her. Mhmm… fabulous idea. Lady praised herself for it as she fallowed his act. She moved forward as did she, but as he halted she did not. She continued close, expression keen and interested, showing intrigue and curiosity. A kitten trying out a new thing she was mimicking him with this new tactic. Female didn’t notice the clouds herding off as she brushed against him in the ever common manner. Wet fur touched fur in an ever peculiar [peculiar in the right that their terms had been rather unmoving or unchanging thus far. Acquaintances learning to cope with the opposing’s short comings seemed the best way to explain it.] manner, she continued down the lengthy of his bod before turning at his tail. Walking behind him she remained perhaps concerningly close, even as she took a seat at his side. Eyes yet to meet his as they peered off towards the yonder sky. She was thinking quickly, and doing her best to keep her eyes forward but she couldn’t help sneaking glances cross ways now and again. She was doing her best to get him uncomfortable, and give a hint what she was here for and… pitter on home. Mhmm… he was also practice in a way. Even if things were rather straightforward. The tricks of the trade were simple enough and often used by every gal about. But, still… practice makes perfect, yah? “I’d just love to know how your day has been, honey.” She said soon enough. It took her a minute to think of something [you see her conversations didn’t take on friendly often then not and she was ever rusty.] but she managed… with a smile ever present, no less.

[Vox]

There was deep meaning behind those words, and it pained Truth to hear them. It was actually quite frustrating to be in Asaki's presence. He could see the lines of type swirling in her eyes, they screaming 'save me! help me!' to him, but all his attempts to rescue her from drowning in her despair had failed. Yelling had not worked, she had put him off and he had left looking bad. Laughing had infuriated her. Mockery was her job, and he paled in comparison when he tried to harness Derision. Kindness was met by confusion, and so he had continued with that. But random comments had seemed to keep her at bay while he thought of something else to do. Truth wanted to shake her until the fibres that made up her being fell apart and he was left with rags. That was pointless, though. And Truth never did anything if it was not backed with a good reason, in his opinion. "Is it really what you want to be? Or is it what others have told you is right? For those two are drastic differences. I have not come to tell you what to do, I've had enough of that." A slightly feral grin, showing all of his pointed teeth, began the next statement. "For now, of course." Ho-no...If she thought he was done with her forever, she was gravely mistaken. He didn't like her when she was mistaken, she took it in the wrong way. Truth preferred to see her in a victorious mood, it made him feel better. There was something decidedly strange about the way she was looking at him. As if she was first brushing him off, then sharpening her interest. As he moved forward, she had advanced as well. But she had not stopped when he did, she had gone farther. As in their debates, he had advanced on her and she had followed suit. But Asaki had gone the extra step, just to make him sweat.

What was her motive? And no, he is not that stupid, he knows exactly what she wants. But, as most things were with this particular lioness, her language was more complex that what he would have expected from a gal forced to these measures. Why him, though? And he thought this, not in an honored way, as if she had chosen him out of a score of others. There were many other males that were more desirable than he, and he knew she would pick them over him any day. But 'they' were not here, now where they? Truth was here, and he had an inkling of why she was not screaming at him to leave. Scare him off? Ah...Now, that would have worked. With anybody but Truth. Adamant, or even stubborn if you will. Although a vague boy, at times, when he had his mind set on something he would pursue it to the ends of the earth. Did she think that a lady in knee high boots could chase him away, stilettos clacking away? Well, come to think of it, that was a very scary though, but not enough to make him stop pursuing her. Maybe enough to keep him from trying to hammer sense into the lass, but not for always and eternity and all the whatnot. Girls rarely 'doll up' for no good reason. They merely say so to keep their real motive safe from prying eyes. But Truth knew that Asaki did not do 'pretty' unless she thought she had something to gain. Obviously she wanted cubs, but was she going to sink this low to get them? Not that he minded, he would oblige her, but it was the motive that worried him. Was there more to it? Was there some complex reason, as there always seemed to be with this woman, that she was enticing Truth? He would have to wait and see, because not only was he confused; Vox was sitting there rubbing her chin too. What was Valid-poo up to this time? For all her said eloquence, Vox was not feeling particularly loquacious today. Nor did she feel she could express herself through any of her numerous characters {as a heads up, Hathor will die soon. I'm feelin' the stress xD}.

|ooc| : I'm trying to get my muse back, but it's escaping me. [/sub][/blockquote]

[Valid]

Aww, see there. Trying to get her in her habit. Saying she was sinking low by doing this little number. She preferred not to see it as ‘sinking’ but to see it as… well, gee, it took more then one girlie to make a baby, didn’t it? And he just so happened to be there. And he just so happened to not be going away. But he was right, there were others she would prefer to have, to get her claws on. But, as spoken they were not here. And he wasn’t too awful or horrible or bad. He was decent, though she was fighting her policies. See, she preferred not knowing the daddy. Preferred it just clean and simple and easy. Usually there wasn’t even an exchange of names, real ones anyway. It saved all the hassle of this ‘all the sudden I want to be a father’ bull and this ‘it is my duty’. She figured she was saving herself and the other the hassle. We all know he wasn’t going to be faithful. Knew he wasn’t going to stick around. She might as well duke it out on her own the full length of the track, instead of replying on someone else as if she was handicapped. And it was all the easier when he didn’t know her, when she didn’t know this mysterious ‘him’. But having an ongoing chat with the possible father? Mhmm… To be honest she didn’t think Truth would, aye it was a male’s nature to take advantage and go along with this ‘not so bad’ deal but… Mhmm, a gut feeling. It said he wouldn’t. But it seemed he was considering it. Maybe? Maybe… oh now she was impressed. Impressed, intrigued. Mhmm, seemed Truth could be a sinner after all. ‘Sinner’ being used loosely after all… but, all the same, all the same she felt a need to pin something on him and, at current, that was the best she cared to come up with.

You know it seemed she was not the only one conflicting. She wanted this, she wanted that and here he goes wanting a triumphant mood, while also wanting to win? For ‘winning’ was pretty much what he desired. And, pretty much this was all just some… oddly drawn out game. The starting line was the first word, the ending ribbon was the words, the actions, whatever it was that ultimately busted down the last few walls and slipped past the last couple of traps and gave him what he was hell-bent on getting. The trophy, the shiny metal, the sheer satisfaction of saving her, it seemed, from her own self. Now, that was odd. A person needing to be saved from their self but… she supposed others didn’t invent straightjackets and fluffy rooms for nothing. Mhmm, Insane Asylum. Didn’t sound too bad, maybe she’d be rooming with Ralos? That wouldn’t be too bad, perhaps… though she heard the food often got a touch dull and shock therapy was just a snitch painful… But, you want to know a secret? You can’t have your cake and eat it too, nor was she here to make him feel better on purpose. As he wished to shake her to shambles she just wanted to get a nail and hammer in her damn point. So thick, so gawh! He couldn’t see, he was blind, he couldn’t… Too long had he sat on his ass in that one position to see anything else. Maybe that, or she didn’t have a point at all. And… from everything said, done, and from the point where the prospect of breeding with him, didn‘t sound all that horrible, you know, she’d leave the guess for someone else. Especially so with that breeding bit, because, my darlings, she was still vicious in her opinion of him. He didn’t stick around to protect his gal? His wife? His love? His Narati? He let the assault happen and that was her opinion and that was all that she minded. But, she supposed that didn’t have much sway in this. She wasn’t asking for him to stick around, wasn’t asking for his protection and besides that she wasn’t Narati, was she?

Motive. She could be trying to smuggle in illegitimate children. Trying to take over his throne because she was just that greedy bitch out to ruin him. Maybe she was trying to kill him, bringing up bad memories perhaps he was. Memories she didn’t want to think about and memories he so desired to resurface. Perhaps she was trying to disgrace him, too, showing how such a pathetic, foul beast he was. She could be trying to make a point by her antics, as well. Or she could be trying to get close, could be genuinely interested and she could simply be bad with articulation. Trying to save him, just to turn the tables. Because, really… perhaps she wasn’t the only one drowning? Perhaps he wasn’t in the safe house either, perhaps he was… Mhmm. Now that was something to ponder. Truthy being similar to her? Similar in that way no less, now that would be odd and… somewhat… mhmm. But it didn’t change the point that her motive could be anything and everything and even the ridiculous may very well be. It may be, but… it wasn’t. He was thinking too much for once, or perhaps she was simply disappointing. Again she would leave the guesses to someone else, but the point of the dagger, the point of this ramble remained. She had no aces up her sleeve or any hidden intent. Be it because she didn’t think him worthy of ‘hidden intent’ or because she just didn’t want to… he could take things at face value, for once, for the most part. She wasn’t aiming to stab him in the back, of ruining him. Wasn’t aiming to use the children against him, to use them as leverage. It was what it was, as far as she was concerned but she was wary, also. Tis why we say ‘he could take things at face value, for once, for the most part’. ‘Just cause’ didn’t mean she was overly trusting of him, didn’t think there was more to be seen and more in him that she could meet and find herself in a bad situation with. Really now… as most men know it isn’t wise to take a strange girl home. After all you could end up with your wallet stolen or a few kidney’s missing. Mhmm, well… men aren’t that innocent either. And she was just that sort of person to not put every once of faith into anything and everything. All her contracts had nice little clauses. The ‘if you screw me over, remember I’m spiteful’ clause, oh my, it’s fabulous. “Could you explain something to me?” He put bait on the hook and that bait was irresistible. A doorway to a debate, and oh this topic was hers. “A lie to one is a truth to another. Just because it’s wrong to one, it could be right to someone else. Does the mean justify the end? Everything is dependant on the context, isn’t it? What does it matter who I want to be if who I want to be isn’t what others think I should be? I will still appear ‘wrong’ to them, so why bother changing himself if I am still ‘wrong’? That would be if I care what others think. After a bit one grows tired of that pursuit. My real question is… since truth is so fickle, you see it changes depending on the person, how can you fallow it? How can you want it? It’s like fallowing a mirage. It’ll change, just to spite you, just to prove you cannot have it. Is that what makes it all the more to you? Trying to get something you can’t have, trying for something in vain? Tragically poetic.” And tragically if he could say yes… then perhaps he could see, in some way of light… why she would be willing to fight something that she would ultimately succumb to. And yet, as she spoke and as her voice came to an end, [amazingly her voice did not shift towards coldness, it still was friendly and surprisingly warm for her] she frowned, tilted her head… and then stared at him, somewhat untrusting and in a misgiving way. Pouting almost… tonight wasn’t suppose to be a night of fighting, feuding, arguing, you know… but it seemed surely that was how it was going to end up. Funny, yet somewhat sad at the same time. Another season missed.

Out of Juice; -tries to give an interesting post- xD

[Vox]

This was perfect. It was even 'juicy', he had been waiting for this. Twinkling eyes erupting into a positive blaze of excitement, Truth easily kept his features calm. Only his eyes could show his true emotions now, for his face was contained and still a little amused. "'You took the words right out of my mouth, darling', is one way to answer this, Asaki. Then, I could walk away. But I have a feeling that will not suffice, and so I shall go deeper. Is there one truth? Or is the truth a series of truths? Does the truth in fact exist? Or do we make it up? Is the truth we make up, the truth itself? Or merely a disgusting parody? Is the truth what 'they' think, or what 'you' think? Who are you, Asaki? Do I actually exist? If you answer yes...I ask you to prove it. If no...Then how are we having this conversation? Is all this really happening? Or have you merely taken one too many aspirins? I will never find out who I really am. Nobody will find out who Truth Light-bringer is, not even you. You with your disdainful, clever, but generally skillful ways." The excitement had died a little from his eyes, and only the smile remained. Now it was larger, and more luminous though. "And now, after having said all that: I would like you to ask yourself if any of it makes sense. Is it valid, Asaki?" Truth bent down, and licked the top of Asaki's head, not suggestively or arrogantly. Merely as if he sincerely liked her, the way a friend might smile and squeeze another friend's arm. He licked his own chest fur and worked his way down to his paws, nibbling between the pads and picked out clumps of dirt. Truth's genuine sense of confusion toward himself was gone now, and Asaki had done it for him. He now accepted that he would stay vague, kind and a little empty until the end of his days. The king was not meant to know the 'great answer', he was meant to find all the great questions and ask them. Maybe he was simply a mirage, an image. If he was...Then the artist who created him had done a damn fine job, especially when it came to appearances.

[/blockquote][/color]

[Valid]

“Then what is the use? I will not know, but I want to know. If I want it bad enough I’ll get it, or will I? Every day one can wake up and wonder if this is really happening. Every day and it makes that one sick. All this effort all this, and only to find out… it’s not really there.” Why put your heart, your soul into anything when there is always a chance that it doesn’t really exist, it’s not really there? She didn’t, she knew better to. A perfect way to feel pain, perfect way to get hurt. And though she was accustom to a variety of painful, hurtful sensations putting everything into something and then having it be collapsed, demolish, having it disappear… was like taking the bullet to the head and she barely scraped by last time. And it was obvious not all of her survived. Pieces were missing, broken and shattered and disintegrated. Her sanity, for the most part was still around. Bobbing around alongside her logic, her reasoning, and then her despair. Why bother asking a question if you won‘t get an answer? Why bother living when ultimately you die? Why bother? “Why call the truth, the truth when its one of many and its fabricated to suit the needs of whoever?” But… this isn’t the first time. Yes, perhaps the first time some said it but it wasn’t the first time she thought about it. And yet it was almost scary. He was agreeing, in a way, with her. Terrifying, she needed to rethink her position, didn’t she? She did but she had been thinking this way for quite a while. It was hard to change, to think something else ‘just cause’.

Even in science, in math there are terms that remain ‘undefined’ and those ‘undefined’ ones are at the core of everything, anything and from there we build. From nothing we build, and so everything is destined to crumble if one things hard enough about it and pick apart the pieces. Like glass shattering at the faintest of touch… She watched him, and soon rolled her eyes. Seeing him smile didn’t do much to please her. Her frown remained and her eyes looked elsewhere with aggravation. Mostly for herself, why had she wasted time? Ever precious time, time slipping away. Such limited time, time used to figure things out, to discover. But what did it matter if things were discovered? Time made them become lost again and then found. Lost, found, lost, found. You know she was wondering now what it would feel like to be… perhaps stupid? For stupid people are happy more often then not. Too stupid to see, to be depressed or gloomy. She had been happy. But it was gone. Funny how that worked, too. How it poofed and evaporated the more she thought. Then again there was nothing to be overly joyful about. It seemed he was content with these ‘mysteries’ content with not knowing things. But she wasn’t, it just nagged at her and bit her and murdered her, alongside all the other little things. “Lies upon lies upon lies. Tricks to amuse but tricks that don’t suffice.” She muttered curtly to herself, her frown unceasing, nor the faltering of whatever smiling image she had had and portrayed.

His touch was unexpected and as a reflex she tensed. Eyes that would have shot up and glared, and claws that would have murdered his face caught on pause. She was surprised by it nor did she exceptionally liked it. And for some odd, peculiar reason it sparked memory of Ibalo and such memory sparked anger. She hated being touched, and hated it more so when others thought themselves in a position when they could get away with it. But she mined her dues, well aware she had opened the door if only for the time being. For the time being, time that was slipping away as was any possible chance of finding someone else. Seemed he had managed to be a leech on her time, time that now dwindled to a close. How sickening, she was getting older, old, old, old. How fabulous, how blood fantastic. “Fare well.” She rumbled, tone regaining its common demeanor. Icy, vicious, and now with a touch of bitterness and sheer pissed-off-ness that seemed all the more suiting, suiting alongside the obvious sarcasm as she rose. The rain was coming less and less but it was still present somewhat as she started off. Frown ever embedded and ill-temper raring. Yes, little doubt she was back to her simply peachy self.

[Vox]

Truth knew she would snap eventually. He was sorry that he had, yet again, managed to make her angry. Suddenly, and very unexpectedly, he felt like a child again. He had made his mother angry, he had upset her with one of his jokes. She didn't like it, Calypso had not liked to be toyed with. Asaki did not like to be toyed with, but she dealt with it differently. Asaki got violent, Calypso would make you feel terrible about yourself merely by looking sorrowful. Truth recalled one of the pranks he had played on her, a cruel one that he would laugh at but not many other people would. He had lied, saying that Dancer had drowned. She had believed him, as she always did, his mother had believed he had been telling the truth as she had taught him and he hadn't been. The aging king recalled how bad he had felt, afterward. But now, it was not the same. The confusion had returned, and his momentary elation was gone. It seemed that whenever Asaki set him free from his own prison, he reminded her of how ineffective her futile attempts to break out of her own cell was. He supposed, he should have expected it. But if he had, the king had done nothing to stop his words. It was what he was supposed to say. "I am growing weary of you pretending that I know the answers to all these things. I don't. And I don't even claim to know the answer to them. I can tell that you were not actually willing to play the game you started, you merely wished to poke at me." His voice was even and his smile was still in place, even the look of faint amusement was there. But there was disappointement in his eyes as well. He had thought she would understand, thought she might be ready. But she wasn't. She didn't want to let go of her comfort blanket and move on. Disappointing...And yet, the truth was not always something that lived up to expectations. "I take 'farewell' as my que to leave. An honor, as always, lady." He turned to leave, tail flicking from side to side to keep his balance, head facing toward his next destination, but his eyes were staring sideways. Trying to get one last glance of the Rhetoric...

[/blockquote]

[Valid]

Why was he sorry, if he knew it would happen sooner or latter, no matter? Why take it upon himself to bother feeling apologetic when it didn‘t really… matter at all what he felt or what he did or how he tried or how he didn‘t try? It was a sure thing, a repetitious thing… “Someone has to know. Why not you?” She snapped as she turned on her heel to view her opponent. Watching him keenly with a surgeon’s eye, a surgeon with a knife just digging underneath the skin, a surgeon who willing forgot the anesthetic. Her words were true, be they blind or hampered by who told them, but they were true. Someone had to know, right? And why not him? Why couldn’t he just lie, hmm? Or tell the truth? Whatever he wished to do why couldn’t he just say something and pretend? He acted as if he knew, he acted as if he had gotten father in this game, this puzzle then she. Was it not common sense to look to the person seemingly ’beating’ it? But she was mistaken, it seemed. What he seemed was not what he was. She had expected too much, for he was just as lost as her, if what he said was true and she could fine no reason why it couldn’t be. So this was just a prolonged session of the blind leading the blind, mhmm? And he was growing weary of it? She was growing weary of looking to others because she couldn’t find it herself. She was growing weary of asking questions that remained unanswered. He was growing weary? He could join the damn club. He wasn’t the only one… he could rest assured of that. He could also rest assured when faced with the prospect of a warm blanket or glass needles one was sure who would choose what.

Pink tongue went over her teeth. Her black lips poised in a line as she glared at him with menacing eyes. Oh yes, violence was the she-devil, perhaps but really now she had yet to hit him or make him bleed. Though she had thought of it now and again she managed to resist temptation. Thus far. “Poke at you? Why the hell not?” She added, watching, vicious eyes keeping tabs on his movement of far and away, his destination the opposite of hers. Yet inwardly a twisted smirk form, as spoke again, “It could be worse. I could be using a needles and knives. But your waiting for that, aren’t you?” Perhaps she was wrong to hope but she was becoming more assured, as time rolled on and their encountered mounted that one of these days, perhaps today, today seemed as good as any other, that she would manage to say something that ‘worked’. That got him off her case and onto someone else’s. For surely he knew there were others worse of then her, others who are ever sadder and ever more so without hope? Surely he could find someone else? Surely she could say something, sooner or later, that would help out in him doing so? As time rolled on she was mounting her faith in it. The more he stuck around the closer it was to him leaving. And maybe, even, today was the last day. That’d be nice. Mhmm… maybe that was how it worked to. A little ‘Fare well’ and then no more?

Getting the last word in was a thing of hers. Could one tell by now? “Take your honor and shove it, sweetums.” Her voice formed the words well as her eyes watched him leave. One last look see? At what a mad woman with everything… yet nothing to be mad at? Some got their kicks out of the darndest of things. But, to each their own she guessed, she guessed though it was well known she wasn’t too keen on his amusement and smiles and glee. Far as his disappointment, that was something to smile at. Not that she would smile. She didn’t feel like it. But the more she convinced him that it was useless, the more she received that oh so ‘disappointed’ look that was suppose to make her feel all bad that she wasn’t what he wanted her to be… the more it joined with that issue of ‘time’ and that feeling of ‘futility’ that was surely building up within him. She was stubborn and he was too, but it was her who was going about thinking she could outlast him. Thinking she could, and thinking she would. Her sinful pride, and her vicious will… lovely little things would help her last. Especially so alongside her anger for him. Anger that was ever building and shifting and wandering. There was a reason why she traveled so, why she didn’t stay in places long. Why prides weren’t where she resided in for long. Others tended to infuriate her… And the more she was around the same people, the same person, the more it grew until finally… it was time to go or time to hide a corpse.